Evolving From Within

I am looking at myself less in the mirror lately.

It is almost as if I am scared to see the deeper me

who is emerging from within me,

like the human part of me is feeling ashamed that she is still hanging around, and

wallowing in her old ways of panic, fear and despair.

 

I love you dear one.

There is nothing to fear or to be ashamed of.

You are a super miracle and I am so honoured to be

journeying through life with you.

Because of you, I have my finger on the pulse

Of human suffering.

Because of you, I am learning that living on the surface

is like constantly riding the waves of life.

Because of you, I can feel the light of God emerging

from within me, teaching me to be the ocean

instead of riding the waves.

Because of you, I know it can be scary to be authentic,

real and unlimited and vulnerable.

Because of you, I know it can be hard to say I love you

without fear of rejection.

Because of you, I am me.

Because of you, I love you.

 

It is time to shine dear one, and there is nothing wrong

with wanting to hide and get comforted.

Come home to me and nestle in close, you don’t need

to look outside for comfort any longer.

I am here.  Patiently waiting.  Loving you and offering my

comfort, from the inside, out to you.

No more solutions can be found out there.

It’s only you and me and it is a miracle to know this.

You are a miracle and so am I.

So let us merge as one and emerge together as One;

One who can shine the light through the darkness

for the ones who are still looking outside of themselves

for that union of divine perfection.

It is within, and only within, and I am here,

crying tears for you, for us, for the One who will emerge

as we merge.

 

May our union be magical for all hearts.

Blessings – A Turning Point

How could I not have known how worthy I am of receiving?

How could I not have seen my true light and value?

How could I have spent the last 36 years without constantly honouring and bowing before the divinity that moves through me, that I am?

 

May I remember to bless myself, to love myself, to nurture myself and to honour myself.

May I eat food consciously and with gratitude.

May I stretch my beautiful body and feel the strength and grace in my muscles.

May I thank my mind for all the beautiful thinking it does for me.

May I appreciate my joints for bending and staying healthy and lubricated.

May I honour the tremendous amount of work that my organs, skin and bodily systems complete, without ever taking a break.

May I look at myself in the mirror and know that my body temple is magnificent and that it houses my bright and shiny soul who wants to come out to play and to love and to dance with all of creation.

May I remember to thank my heart, for beating and for leading me into this new territory of being open and vulnerable.

May I celebrate the fierce passion arising within me, the one that makes me feel like I have the power to ignite that same fire within the bellies and hearts of all.

May I honour myself so much that I never once question whether I should be authentic or not.

May my heart be light and may I nourish myself with love, healthy food, prayer, chanting, nature, dance and wonderful company as never before.

May every choice I make and every breath I take be rooted in love and gratitude and reverence for the being that I am.

May I always remember that I am worth it and that it is never a sacrifice to stop and take better care of all of my precious self.

Namaste and Wohoo, all at once : )

 

Note from me: I listened to the Guided Meditation for Conscious Eating from Ramdesh Kaur’s meditation CD called the Body Temple. It opened me up to all the ways that I could and wanted to honour myself more deeply.  It was a deeply transformational experience that led me to hearing the words above in my head.

I see you

Sitting in a dark corner

wishing, hoping, hating.

I see you in the dark.

From where I sit, there

is light all around you,

but you can only see the darkness.

My dear one,

stand up and

step out of the darkness.

With one gentle I love you to your heart,

to your shattered innocence,

it gets easier to stand up.

No more seclusion,

no more punishment and doubt.

Rise up, dear one, rise up

and honour the magnificence that you are.

 

Note from me: my heart gave me these words a few hours after a conversation I had with someone.  I was driving and I felt a lot of pressure in my chest and I realized that I needed to write some words down.  After I wrote them, I felt a lot better and I knew that these words were my heart’s way of sending healing to all those who felt the same as that person I talked to, which is exactly how I used to feel.

Say yes to vulnerability

Say yes to vulnerability.

Say yes to all the ways you thought you shouldn’t be.

Say yes to being honest.

Say yes to admitting you are struggling.

Say yes to choosing love over fear.

Say yes to peace.

Say yes to having your walls knocked down.

Say yes and thank you to the fear  that wants to keep you safe.

Say yes to having your safe-haven opened and exposed.

Say yes to you;

All that is waiting for you is you

and more love than you ever imagined possible.

You are very worthy of saying yes to.

 

-Thanks for reading.  You are worthy.

 

Hourglass of Humanity

Hourglass of Humanity

To the parts of me that are peeling away and who feel unsafe about where the shedding will take them, I love you.

To the parts of me who feel so broken and unravelling and who don’t know where to go or what to do or how to act, I love you.

To the waves of emotions that wash through me, both gently and with full force, I love you.

I am learning to be the observer of all that happens within me and through me and around me, but the ones who are merging, shedding, peeling away and molting are unsure about how to do this.

Is it me I am feeling or just the waves of emotions that all humans feel?

I do think we are connected through our feelings and through our truest and deepest natures. It’s like we’re an hour glass, collectively and individually, and we feel it when the sand moves from one side to the other, kind of like how humanity is moving from living unconsciously to living more consciously, but the hour glass keeps flipping throughout that evolution, so that we can have the ultimate experience of growth, both personally and collectively.

Today, the hour glass has flipped and I am feeling that despair, that pain, fatigue and exhaustion. By writing this though, I feel better.  The hour glass will tip again and I can watch the grains of sand pouring through me, no matter what they bring along with them to be witnessed, observed and loved.

Peace to you and to all.

Note from me: I wrote this nearly two months ago and it helped me to be more patient, loving and understanding with myself as I was flipping back and forth between feeling blissful and lost. I can sense that I will expand on this topic in the near future as I have more insights from going through this!  May it help you! Namaste!!!

 

Loneliness: a poem and reflection

What is loneliness but a word?  A word we give so much of ourselves to….

What if we are really only lonely for ourselves?

What is important to you?  What makes you feel happy, uncomfortable, angry and sad?

By asking ourselves these questions and any number of deep questions, we get to know ourselves and we stop looking for answers in society, in a role we have or play, in a job, an income, from our conditioning, from others, from our so-called social status or even our Facebook status.

Is it possible to get our own attention?  Is it possible that everything other than our deepest selves are distracting us, almost like a gift, so that we can learn to go to our own “store” within, to explore, look for “deals” and find out our real status?

That is the gift in all of the busyness of our North American society and what it values; the distractions can be so numerous that we can have no choice but to find shelter within, only to discover a whole world of magnificence that has been quietly waiting for us.  It’s called You, it’s called Me, it’s called Us.

If we are with ourselves and we spend time tending the gardens of our own hearts, bodies, minds and spirits then what is loneliness but a word…because ultimately wherever we each go, we are there.  Maybe, individually and collectively, we can learn for each of us to be all we each need…to be enough…to be the answer and companion we have been seeking all along.

May all loneliness be lifted up to Heaven to be healed, resolved and transformed, lovingly and gently, for the well-being of all hearts.

 

Become the Ocean

The two sides of me met today.

 

The part of me that feels connected to the divine has been growing stronger and

she nurtured the one who has been trying to stay afloat in the ocean of human suffering.

 

She whispered to the one who has been struggling to float

And she said,

 

“Become the ocean.

You don’t need to try to float anymore.

You don’t need to fight anymore.

You don’t need to struggle anymore.

Become the ocean.

Merge with the ocean.

Stop fighting and give yourself to the ocean;

for when you are the ocean

you don’t have to do anything;

you just are the ocean

and you can just observe everything that happens in the ocean,

without getting lost in the waves and storms.”

 

“Become the ocean,” she said.

 

I watched the one who struggles

and she stopped flailing around

and she started to relax.

After a few minutes

she wasn’t there any more,

for she had merged with the ocean.

The one who struggles became the one

who observes life and all of its waves,

as opposed to the one who fears the waves and tries

to get away from them.

 

For now I will rest and

be grateful to the wholeness within me

for bringing the one who struggles to the surface,

to become the ocean;

a symbol of the wholeness of the universe,

of the waters of heaven that pour into all hearts,

regardless of when we are ready to become the ocean, the universe,

the purity, the divine.

 

May we all rest easy in knowing that the waters will call for us to join them

when we are ready to stop the fight,

the struggle to stay afloat.

 

Peace be with you and with me, as we allow the shift in our experience

from the floater

to the all:

the ocean.

My thoughts about this poem: This was literally my experience yesterday and it blew me away.  I was dizzy so I lay down and then I started crying and I felt the right side of me awaken and talk to the left side of me, who was drowning.  The words I wrote above were what I heard within me.  I was repeating, “become the ocean,” out loud to myself for a short while too.  I am feeling very blessed to be going through this awakening and it is my wish and intention that by sharing this with you, that you will know that you are not alone, that there are gifts in all of your suffering and that the answers truly do come at the right time. I have wished for my life to be easier many times, but now that I am here, I would not have traded one bit of suffering, because it is exceptionally sweet and beyond description to be learning to pull myself up out of suffering and give myself a hug.  May your inner truth shine so brightly so that it may speak softly to you, just as mine is starting to do more and more.