What if your pain is golden?

What if your pain is calling out to you?

What if your pain is you, trying to get your own attention?

What if your pain represents all parts of you that were deemed unacceptable, unworthy, or wrong?

What if your pain is really just you, trying to come home to you?


May we all open our hearts wide to our pain,

to the lost, banished and shamed parts of ourselves,

to the aspects of self who are so desperate to come home that they hurt and we hurt.


May we all open our eyes and senses to what our bodies are telling us,

to the messages hidden within the pain

to the longing to stop seeking outside for a resolution and to turn around and find the answers

within ourselves.


Like riddles and puzzles our pain calls to us;

it gives us clues to solve the simple mysteries

of coming home to ourselves and uniting

within ourselves.


May we all be blessed with the courage to say,

“Pain I love you.

I welcome you.

I honour your mysteries

and I ask you to share with me

so that I may love you as me

and welcome you home into my heart.”


As we take these bold steps toward loving everything that

happens in our experience, may all hearts be touched by our


our bravery

and our deep desire to be in harmony within ourselves and

with life, no matter what circumstances occur.


May we rise up as the divine beings we truly are

and embrace our pain as the secret messenger of our

innocence, purity, power and everlasting love.


– Written in honour of Matt Kahn’s pure teachings of love


The Truth About Santa Claus

I just heard today that there is a movement in the United States to change the words of the classic poem/story, The Night Before Christmas.  There is talk of removing the part:

“the stem of a pipe he held tight in his teeth, the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath.”

I can understand that we want the best “model” for our children, but I’m wondering if we should take a closer look at the other parts of our lives and what we “teach” about Santa Claus instead:

  • Lots of people smoke, including the parents of the children who all love and adore Santa Claus….
  • When I think of Santa, I never think of him smoking a pipe, I think of him eating cookies, smiling, laughing, putting presents under the tree, flying through the sky, and loving all the children of the world.
  • If we want to make modifications, let’s first start with the lyrics of Christmas songs, “you’d better not cry, you’d better not shout, you’d better not pout…he knows if you’ve been bad or good so be good for goodness sake.”  Why are we using a beautiful holiday season and a jolly beautiful spirit like Santa Claus to program and bribe our children so they’ll be “good”?  What is wrong with crying and yelling sometimes?  We all appreciate a good cry and how great we feel afterwards, and sometimes you need to raise your voice, especially if you are standing up for yourself.  Do we really want to teach our children some more polar opposites like good or bad?  How about we teach them how to be, just be themselves, the perfect beings that they are.  Why not teach them that we will love them no matter how they act, that they are unconditionally and whole-heartedly loved, not just by us, but by Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny, by all the beautiful mystical beings who exist as so real and so true in the imaginations of our children.  What happens to us that we can no longer believe….
  • Why not teach children and adults the truth of Santa Claus?   Santa Claus is pure love, pure and simple.  Santa is imaginary or real or both, it is up to you, but just because he is imaginary doesn’t mean that he is any less real.  How many of us remember imaginary friends or guardian angels with us, but then because people told us they can’t possibly be real, we ended up forgetting them.  Is it the same for Santa Claus?  Let’s continue with the magic of Santa, the love that he offers to all of us.  We don’t have to give him up or the love just because we are growing up!  We can keep that love in our hearts, Santa has it for each and every one of us, we just have to believe!  We can add to the beauty of Santa and his love and add some details to the story, like how the parents help him with presents, how he talks to us in our hearts, how we can call on the love of Santa any time we need it, not just in December, that he is the spirit of unconditional love and giving, which lives in all of us, and how we can be like Santa sometimes and drop off gifts and delight in the pleasure of giving, not just receiving.
  • Let’s open up our hearts, let’s not talk about Santa from a place of fear, but from a place of openness and trust and love.  He never has to leave us, so let’s keep his spirit alive within our hearts and continue to believe.  The children always will, it’s only because of the way the Santa story has been spun with all the deception and secrets that lends to such disappointment and feelings of deception.  Why let the magic die?  Let’s keep it alive, that is what life is for, reclaiming the love and magic in all aspects of our lives.

from www.scienceblogs.com


I so vividly remember my own Santa disappointment.  I remember how much I held onto the belief that he was real, but it slowly slipped away because there wasn’t any support for Santa living on past children being 12 years old (I really held on!!).  As I’ve been journeying to my heart over this past year and a half, I have come to remember the truth of Santa Claus and so I share it with you in this post.  We can change the way Christmas is taught, not with big changes, but subtle ones, subtle changes to encourage children to believe in what they know is true, just like how innately all children know and remember God, even just at the mention of God (our daughter walks around singing a song she made up, “everyone remembers God.”).  Santa is real, Santa is love, love never dies nor does Santa.  Whether he has a pipe, a big belly that shakes like a bowl full of jelly, or a big pack slung over his back, he is real!  He is love, and when you connect to yourself as I have been learning to do (and like we all innately know how to do!!), you see it as an absolute truth, Santa is real, he is always in your heart, loving you and encouraging you.  His biggest gift to you isn’t the presents (although that is fun and he needs our support for that part), it’s the love!!  The LOVE!!

I was talking to a 4 year old girl a month or two ago and she was already getting ready for Santa and that she was excited for him to come.  I remember telling her that she doesn’t even need to wait for Christmas, that she can feel Santa and all his love right in her own heart, and that is where he will always be.  It was very sweet and spontaneous and her eyes lit up and when I was leaving she gave me a big hug and a kiss, right on the lips!!  I hadn’t seen her in nearly a year and it made me realize how very lucky I was and how I was on to something.  Santa is real and he is always with us.  The children know this!!

I was at a healing session one time and there was quiet healing music playing and then all of a sudden, very loud Christmas music started playing.  I remember looking up at Jean (the healer/coach that our family sees) and she said, “wow, how about that,” and some other words about how there were others there with us at the session and I knew it right then and there that it was confirmation for me that Santa was real, Santa and Christmas are real, as real as we want them to be, we just have to believe.  I came from such a place of sadness and disbelief of all love and magic, so for that to happen as I was starting to reclaim the love that I am, that we all are, it was magic, there was no doubt.  From that moment on, I didn’t worry what I told my little girl about Santa, because he was real.  I could tell her my experience with the music turning on, I could tell her that he is love and about giving and sharing love and that we can celebrate that love and giving with the spirit of Santa every Christmas.  So no matter how we tell the story (that he tells us what to buy, etc), it is okay, because he is real and he is love.  Have I mentioned that enough?   Tee hee.

I also read a great book about the magic of Santa and how to keep it alive without ever worrying about disappointing your children: http://www.thesantastory.com/ I recommend for those interested in a deception and worry free Santa experience for themselves and their families!



Taking candy from a stranger!!

The other day, my daugher Zara (just 3!) and I went out for an adventure.  We went to get hair cuts and then we had a couple of errands to do, all within walking distance of each other.

After the adventure of the hair cut for Zara and the pressure from the hair dresser for her to grow her hair long and Zara taking on the pressure and changing her mind and me singing to her, trying to bring her back to her heart, so she could make her own decision, instead of already being influenced by the outside world, and Zara coming back to her happy place, we went to the drug store.  We got what we needed and we were in line.  We were chatting and waiting and then another cash opened.  I didn’t dash over because everyone usually does, but this time, no one did.  So I started to walk over and asked Zara to come with me, and I caught the eyes of an older man who was walking to the same line.  I urged him on, but he smiled at me and he said that Zara and I could go first.  We were waiting and he started talking to Zara about her neato bright yellow sunglasses and she started talking right back to him.  He seemed delighted and it was awesome for her to have someone who was actually engaging her and actually listening instead of just smiling at her and thinking she’s only cute and that’s it.  I always glow inside when I see people talking to children, seeing them and listening to them.  It’s such a gift for children, for all of us really, to be seen, heard and listened to.  So we talked together and then it was our turn to pay.  He was talking to me, telling me how great she is, how well “disciplined she is,” and I remember smiling at him and telling him, “we just love her a lot and try to honor her,” and he smiled back at me and it was so obvious that he was very enamored with Zara.  While I was paying, I caught him reaching to the chocolate section, and he reached over to the cashier and said, “Can you write down the barcode for this, I’d like to give it to Zara, she’s been a pleasure to talk to, she’s such a beautiful girl, I’d like to buy this for her and then I’ll pay for it when you ring up my stuff.”

No joke.  Does this actually happen?  I was floored.  Like, neato!!!  Zara is awesome!  I’m not really one for buying gifts as a form of love or praise, but it was so genuine, so heartfelt, I thought it was just precious.  Zara got a whole Aero bar for herself.  I said thank you and she looked at the chocolate bar with big eyes.  I usually don’t prompt her to say thank you because she often will, but she was so stuck in the chocolate bar, I just whispered to her, “if you appreciate it you could let him know,” and she looked up at him and said thanks.  We said goodbye and then I told her while we were walking out how special she is, and how that just doesn’t happen to people.  Then she wanted to eat it!  Tee hee, so I opened it for her and we walked across the street while she was eating it and we went into the health food store, tee hee again, I felt like an oxymoron walking in there like that, but it was all good.  What a brilliant day!

It wasn’t until I told my mom about it and she was like, “and you let her eat it, it’s candy from a stranger, you’ll have to teach her about that,” that I realized what had happened.  I am so energy sensitive, I feel the smallest tinge of anything and everything and all I felt from that man was love, oh I almost forgot, his name is Mike.  So it didn’t even occur to me to freak out.  It occurred to me to witness the magic that happens when people live from love, live from their hearts.  I will have to keep that lesson in mind though, as it is important, but first, I will teach Zara to trust her instincts, to listen to her heart, to feel with her heart, then I think she’ll always know what to do, with guidance from us of course.

Hooray for love, hooray for chocolate, hooray for living from the heart!