When there is nothing but scattered

This is what it felt like this morning in our home (photo from webdesign.org)

I think we all know this feeling.  The feeling of being pulled everywhere, of not knowing what to do next, of being confused, feeling pulled in every direction.  I like to call it scattered.  I lived like that for sooooo long. It’s only since I’ve started on this healing journey and learning about emotions, how they get stored in the body, and how parts of us can actually leave our bodies unless we are grounded.  Yes, I actually just wrote that.  Apparently that’s what happens when we feel scattered, that it is time to sit in silence, be with ourselves, call all parts of us back in and get grounded, get your feet back on the ground, get balanced, get focused, whatever you call it, it’s what so many of us need, our family included.

So this morning, things were going fine, we were playing, organizing, eating together and hanging out.  Then, we started doing some laundry, some sweeping, and we started taking care of the house, each one of us was doing something different.  I felt like it was okay, but then I noticed that Zara (our almost 3 year old daughter) was running back and forth between us, calling out to both of us, but not actually doing anything.  I was trying to keep her engaged, keep her focused, and it was kind of working, but it wasn’t enough.  Then I decided to take a bath and she was running around Robbin (my husband), and coming back into the bathroom and back and forth.  So I asked Robbin to help her get settled, to empower her, to give her some choices of things she could do, instead of running around between the two of us.  That worked for awhile, but then it wore off.  So I got out of the bath and we all ended up downstairs and I realized what it was.  I don’t think any of us were grounded.  It could also have been that either just me or just Robbin wasn’t grounded and then Zara was picking up on that and she was just running around because she wasn’t grounded either.  So with none of us grounded, it was a big scattered run around mess.

We were sitting in the living room and I was helping her to see that she needs to be grounded so that she can not feel everything around her (this was before I realized that Robbin and I likely weren’t grounded either).  So she wasn’t too interested, but she could see that she could get all of her scattered thoughts and parts back in, so she did that.  Then we sat quietly while Robbin and I got grounded (we sat, we breathed, we connected with our bodies until we could feel them tingle, there are lots of ways, we both really like touching our fingertips together and breathing and feeling our bodies, the healer/coach/guide whom we see taught us that, and it’s also in A New Earth By Eckhart Tolle).  Before we knew it, the difference in the room was huge.  I felt more calm, with my feet on the ground so to speak, and Robbin felt it too, and then, Zara was off, playing by herself behind the couch with all her guys.  I was stunned.  As simple as that.  It had nothing really to do with Zara, she was just picking up on what Robbin or I were going through, or our lack of grounding.  We’re trying to teach her to be grounded so she herself can be focused, so she won’t be drawn into all the energy scenarios and dramas around her.  Slowly it’s making a difference for her, I think it’s hardest around your family though, we all know this:)

I had to share it.  I likely don’t know all the deal, the deep deep intricacies, but I know that it helped.  That with grounded, calm and focused parents, children can thrive.  Now, it’s just about remembering to get grounded and to coach her to do the same.  Tee hee, maybe not a small feat, but something awesome to work towards.  Then our house looked more like this and we were able to get it back to this much more quickly if it got back to scattered mode!

Beautiful peace, beautiful openings to start from, instead of the scattered whirlwind...from ndsu.edu

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